An Incredible Young Adult Novel

Wildlife by Fiona Wood

I almost didn't read this book. That would have been tragic because it turns out it's an incredible story. Before I started to read Wildlife, I sent out a silent wish to the universe, saying “Give me something I can't put down, something that sucks me in and doesn't let me go.” Then I picked up this book because I had it from the library and hadn't started it and had no expectations.

Usually, a book gets 50 pages to grip me hard enough and for me to make a decision about whether I'll finish it. This time, I made it 5 pages in and thought, “I'm not going to read this...” Then I got to page 7. This story is told from multiple perspectives (add one point!) and handles each of them so very well (add another point!). I really thought this would turn out to be “just another teen book” even though I'd read it on a Book Riot list of top feminist teen novels. It was so much more than what I expected.

I haven't read “Six Impossible Things” since it hasn't been released in the US yet, but I don't feel like I missed anything by not reading it before this one.

So here's what I loved:

This is not a love story. There is a romance, like in almost every YA book, but this story is not focused on that. This is a book about teenage girls' relationships with each other, both the good and the bad.

This was an incredibly believable book. I love some good paranormal YA every now and again, but when I read a realistic book, I want it to be that: realistic.

There was no teenage anst. Teenage drama, yes. But not crying in my room over a boy I talked to that one time and why doesn't he love me kind of junk.

There are strong feminist characters. And there are hidden, subtle lessons about how to become a strong feminist female in your own life.

The ending. It was perfect.

What I didn't love:

… I honestly can't think of anything. And I always try really hard to give both the pros and the cons of books so that people can weigh them to make an informed decision. I would recommend this one to anyone, though. Anyone who loves teen literature, or even coming of age stories that are perhaps not necessarily directed toward teens. Because that's what this book is, it's learning who your friends are, but more importantly, it's struggling with who you are and who you want to become. And it's beautiful.

Types of Readers

I have a review coming very very soon. But the book was so incredible that I don't want to submit the review until it's at least sufficient (I don't think words can do it justice; you'll just have to read the book to get the actual full effect).

But because I really want to keep writing more often, I was thinking of other things to write about while I was trying to decide what to read next.

Have you seen this picture of the “Types of Readers?”

It comes across my Facebook newsfeed probably at least once a month from one source or another. It came across again recently, and I got to thinking about how I've changed within the past 2 years or so from an Introvert Reader to somewhere between a Polygamist and Neurotic Reader. So here's that story and also a guide to what it's like for me in between books.

I remember in school, all the way back through elementary, I would find one author I liked and read everything they wrote. And then I would find another author, usually pretty similar to the last and read everything from them as well. This went on through the first couple years of college too, and after. Sometimes, if I find the right author or series, I will still read a lot of their work.

Over the past couple years, though, especially while working in a bookstore, I've realized how narrow my scope of reading has been. I don't want to only read chick lit and teen (which is most of what I read previously). I was pretty sure I'd never read a complete nonfiction work of any kind. Ever. And I was 23. So I've been trying to expand my reading to other genres. (There are still some genres I just can't read: history, sports, most sci-fi.) Around the same time, I came to the very sad realization that I will never finish all the books I want to read. So at this point, I won't finish books that I don't enjoy. I give it around 50-100 pages (depending on how long it is total), and at that point if I just can't do it anymore, I don't. And I've given up the guilt.

The main time I'm a Polygamist/Neurotic reader is between books. Once I finish the “main” book I'm reading, the one that really holds my attention and makes me want to finish it, I get a little lost. I'll start probably 5-10 books trying to find the next “one” to actually get through. I read a couple pages, then think about something else I'd rather do. Eventually I find the right one though and read it, then go back to some of the others I started.

I still binge on genres, though. I'll get sucked into humor biographies, or fairy tale retellings, or something else pretty specific and really want to read a ton of that until I get burnt out. And then it's time to start my insane process again.

This year, I'm attempting the Book Riot Read Harder Challenge to broaden my reading even more. If you want to join in, now's the time! There's even a Goodreads Group for it, and speaking of that, I'd love to see what you're reading so add me on there!

What kind of reader are you? Have you always been that kind or has it changed over time?

Resolutions. That dirty, dirty word.

Resolutions:

I mentioned in my “First Review of the Year” that I have several goals for myself that aren't exactly the standard (at least from what I know about usual resolutions – losing weight, better finances, get organized etc – since originally writing this, it turns out my resolutions are pretty common, but oh well). So I wanted to actually write my goals for myself this year and put them somewhere I can revisit them toward the end of the year to see how I did.

1. I want to find a new career. As much as I love working with books, retail isn't satisfying for me. Life is short and I want to spend it doing something that matters. Even if it's working in a library instead of a bookstore, I want to start myself on a path toward something new that will do more than pay the bills.
2. Read and Write More. This is a tricky one. I want to broaden my reading horizons. I want to read more quality than quantity this year. I am semi taking the Read Harder Challenge from Book Riot. The goal is to gain new perspectives. I think this is crucial to living well. At the same time, I want to give myself the time I need to write. I haven't written a lot since school ended almost 2 years ago and even if it's not something personal, it's something I need to be able to unwind. Without writing, I lose sleep and don't focus or function as well as I know I can. I am going to try to schedule time for myself this year to write something, no matter what it is, each week. I am also enrolling in free classes on a site called edX.org (the first starts today!). I want to learn this year and really push myself to see what I am capable of. I can also get certificates to maybe use on applications to show that I'm willing and able to learn.
3. Use a Schedule and Slow Down. This is the most important one to me for this year. I want to practice better time management. I want to better plan out my days so I can feel like I'm accomplishing what I need to, but at the same time, I want this to better my family time. I want to make sure I take care of what I need to do so that when I have time to spend with the ones I love, I am not worried about work or anything else so I can just enjoy them.

This is the first year I've actually admitted to making resolutions in a long time, probably since high school. But I think these are doable. If I'm not exactly where I think I should be when 2016 rolls around, I am going to follow the 4^th resolution and stop worrying about things that don't need it.

Do you make resolutions? What are your goals and plans for this year?

New Year, New Review

Is it naive and ridiculous to think: "This will be the year I review more books!"? Yes, yes it is. But maybe I'll review a few more than last year and that will be sufficient. I have several goals this year that have nothing to do with reading or writing (or weight loss or the other usual suspects), but maybe I'll write a little more often while I'm at it. Either way, here's the first review of the year.
(Disclaimer about this book: While I thoroughly enjoyed it, that does not mean everyone would. This is not one I'd recommend to just anyone, but for a select group of people that I think would actually find it fascinating. Also, it doesn't release until February 3. Sorry)

How to Be a Heroine by Samantha Ellis

4 Stars

I’m not sure what I thought this book would be. But it wasn't anything I expected. And I can’t say I've read anything like it before. (Not that there isn't something like it, but I just hadn't picked it up.)

The best way to describe this book is that it is a biographical literary criticism. This is the story of Samantha Ellis re-reading her way through her old favorites, but with a more feminist eye after she engages in a debate with her best friend over who is the best heroine. While she’s re-reading these books, she is also trying to find herself: her career, love, and who she is.

What I loved:

*It was fascinating to read the feminist side of so many well known books and to see how reading books at different times in your life will change how you see them.

*It was fun to read a literary critic without feeling like you were caught up in the terminology, but instead you get to see how it actually applies to someone’s life.

*Ellis never got bogged down by the issues she faced. She used books to get her through some very tough times and showed what an important role books can play.

*The end. It was a realistic ending, but at the same time a lovely one.

*I’ve got a long list of books I need to read now. Books with strong women that I would like to learn more from. Unfortunately, that also means that I just have more books to read in a never ending list of books to read.

What I would have liked more:

*I know it wasn’t the point of the book, but I would have liked to have had more of Ellis’s story. It felt that while we glimpsed her, the book focused more on the other heroines, instead of Ellis. Maybe there will be a follow up. (That is a very personal thing to ask of someone, though.)

Overall, I would say that it may be a rather smaller audience that would really love this book, but for anyone who is interested in literary theory (without so much technical aspect), this was a fascinating and fun read.

Dorothy Must Die Review

Dorothy Must Die by Danielle Paige

5 of 5 stars

This was one of those books I was anxiously awaiting and when the store I work in got it in, I was so excited to check it out, but was also nervous that it would fall short. It did not disappoint.. I finished it in 3 days. I couldn’t put it down. And I didn’t know it was part of a series. I don’t read books that have a sequel until all of the books are published. Because it makes me crazy to get to the end of a book and know that there’s more and have to wait for it. This was definitely a great example of this. I’m going to try to be as descriptive as possible without giving anything away.

What I liked:

*I love the new take on the Wizard of Oz. I love that Dorothy and her friends are the villains. I love that the lines of Good and Wicked have been blurred.

*The world building was beautiful. The descriptions of Oz itself were fantastic, but the descriptions of everything else going on were also lovely.

*I liked the development of most of the characters.

*This was a <very> dark twist on the original story and it works well.

*There is a lot of action going on.

*Even though she was a stereotype a lot of the time, Amy was clever and witty.

*There was very little romance. While I’m usually all about romance, it’s often a frustrating subject in teen books. There was some very minor romantic interest, but no one is making decisions based on the love of their life that they just met.

What I didn’t like:
*I hate pop culture references and they tend to be all over the place in teen fiction. Fortunately, like many other books, the references stop after a short while.

*There was a lot of angst going on. I wanted to slap Amy during about ¼ of the book.

*Some of the foreshadowing was way too overt, but it never led to anything.

*You can tell that the writing is from a new author, but it wasn’t awful.

*This is a series. How did I not know this was a series??? It felt like the book just stopped. I understand cliffhangers, but ugh.

I would definitely recommend this to anyone who likes retellings, but I would probably suggest to wait until the next book is out, if not all 3.

Peter Pan was kind of a butt.

So I know that last post was kind of a downer. So here is another book review. I've been using books as a kind of therapy and it's working really well. And I'm reading a lot more now.

Tiger Lily by Jodi Lynn Andersen

3.75/5 Stars

I’m sure anyone reading my book reviews has noticed the fairy tale retelling kick I’ve been on. I’m still not sorry and now there’s another. (In my defense, I have read two religion books –even though they were both pretty short – amidst these novels.) I knew I needed more of these types of stories to keep my reading level high, and then I stumbled onto this gem. This chart is amazing. I found a ton of books I need to read now, and I got it into my head that I should read a Peter Pan story. I went through the ones on the list and this seemed like the best new perspective.

What I liked:

*Minor characters: Tik Tok and Pine Sap were my favorite characters in the book. I think all of the minor characters were well developed though. I liked having Hook and Smee’s back stories.

*Plot premise: This was the first rewriting of Peter Pan I’ve read and really the only one I could find that wasn’t a little kids’ book. I loved the focus being about Tiger Lily. I often imagined Peter as kind of a jerk and this book finally openly admits that he really is.

*Point of View: I liked seeing Tinkerbell not being a brat and actually caring about someone

*It doesn’t even kind of matter for the story itself, but the cover is beautiful.

*I don’t care whether a book has a happy or sad ending, but I do like closure. I got that with this book.

Drawbacks:

*While it was a really good story, nothing really ever grabbed my attention and drove me to finish. I finished it because I had nothing better to read at the time, but it could have been easily put to the side and forgotten about it.

*I felt more attached to the secondary characters than the main ones. I didn't like Peter Pan and didn't want him to be with Tiger Lily. A lot of times I felt detached from her as well.

*There were a few parts of the plot that seemed a little rushed/awkward. I don’t want to give anything away, but this happens only a few times.

*There were also a few things about Tiger Lily that are never explained but were set up like they should have been.

Because sometimes reality gets the best of you and you just need to write about it.

We interrupt your not-so-regularly scheduled programming for a bit of my real life. This is where I write so it’s where I’m putting this. I have some other posts to write up still too, but for now, this is what I have. (If this is the first or only time you've read anything I've written, I usually don't write this stuff so whether you want to read more like this or not, it's not something to expect.)

So I guess this will be real talk time, and it’s hard for me to write but I feel like it’s necessary (more so for me than for anyone else). Why am I writing something so incredibly personal where anyone can see? 1. Because I need to get it out of my head where the words swirl around constantly. 2. If someone does see it and feels the same, I really want them to know they’re not alone because this can be a very lonely place. Even if you have people around you, it’s a little easier knowing someone else has felt the same (while at the same time you wouldn’t wish it on anyone). And I also want anyone who feels like this to know that reaching out to someone is the best thing you can do for yourself right now.

A few days ago I had my 6 week postpartum appointment with my midwife. I knew before the appointment that I’ve been struggling, and I was finally ready to admit that I needed some help. The biggest thing was the roller coaster I’ve been on with my hormones. And it’s just not stopping. I have to fill out this questionnaire thing about how I’ve been feeling every time I go to the pediatrician’s office for my little giraffe. The problem is that I know what they want me to say to be able to tell me I’m normal and fine and everything is going great. Unfortunately, that means that none of the doctors have known that I haven’t been fine lately and everything has not felt great. This time, I answered the questions more honestly. I admitted that I would like to run away from my life at times, and that I’m terrified everything I’m doing is wrong, and I can’t stand hearing my kid cry. all. the. time. And then I got to hear what I was dreading.

“You have postpartum depression.”

This was followed by the doctor telling me that I’m one of the ones that often get missed. The type of person who has dealt with depression without wanting to take medicine so she learns how to still get up and go to her responsible adult life things. The kind who can still get dressed and look presentable, who can still make eye contact and look like I’m fine. Because I can shut everything out for most of the day so that I can function.

Until night begins, and then I just want to scream. Every time I hear the giraffe cry. Every time I hear her start to fuss and I start to panic it’s going to turn into a complete meltdown. And I’m changing a diaper with my eyes half shut hoping I put a diaper on her and not the cat. And I’m mad that I’m not getting any sleep. And I feel like a terrible parent because I don’t like this screaming person right now. She’s taking away my sleep. She’s stealing my husband’s attention. And damnit, I want to cuddle with him now that I don’t have a giant pregnant belly or heartburn lying between us.

And then it shifts. And I’m not angry any more. I’m so upset with myself for feeling like this. I start to think “I can’t believe my baby doesn’t like me, and I’m not fond of her myself.”

I’m told I’m not alone in this. I’m told that a lot of people feel this way, and a lot of them don’t admit it. I hope this gets better with the suggestions of the doctor. I hope that soon I feel loving towards the sweet girl I’m holding more often than frustrated. Because part of my brain recognizes how lovely her tiny smiles are. Part of me knows that I’m missing out on these weeks that I’m actually able to spend at home with her. The biggest part of me, though, realizes that I am incredibly lucky to have my husband taking care of her and me and going to work while I try to keep just myself put together. And that part of me really wants to give him his wife back.